Category Archives: Gross

Cleaning the Pipes

If you’re not following Dr. Ruth on Twitter, you are missing out.

For instance, there was this nugget a little earlier today:

Men who ejaculate 5x/week in their 20s reduce risk of getting prostate cancer later by a third. Protect yourself guys.

I love that she not only lays out the science, but encourages men to “protect” themselves by, ya know, 5x/week.

And here’s where I get to thinking deeply in terms of religion.  Our particular brand (and this is by no means specific to Judaism) frowns on what is probably the most common male method for getting to ejaculation.  Wasting and all that.  And unless a guy’s sexual partner is a real champ (and even if so, during those two weeks he’s not allowed to do anything), pretty much the only way to get to 5 times a week.

So what does this mean?  If the halacha knew that there were tangible, identifiable benefits to masturbation, would it still be assur?  With slightly better knowledge, scientifically, of men’s health and internal plumbing, should the halachic attitudes change?

For instance, if it’s shown that regular maintenance of the plumbing system (flushing the old, to make way for fresh new sperm) is beneficial not only for a man’s health (as above) but also increases the likelihood of insemination and healthy children during copulation, does that change the calculus?

I know my overall mentality on almost everything is that halachah should adapt, especially in the face of better scientific knowledge, and this is no different.  I guess I just wanted a reason to write about masturbation, ejaculation and halachah.

/Achievement unlocked


I Don’t Know Whether To Be Amazed or Grossed Out

Yes, I do…..this is awesome.

I present the Snack Food Stadium:

snack food stadium

That Would Be Uncomfortable

Some people might be focusing on what their cell phone is doing to their head, but think about this: what if you, like me, keep your cell phone in your pocket (or on your waist) so close to your nads?


Received via email from Abba G


I mentioned this here, but I think this deserves its own post.

Starting friday night, my younger daughter, who is seven months old, kenehora, started getting a runny nose.  That night, she didn’t sleep well at all.  All shabbos, she was clearly tired and uncomfortable, but not showing any symptoms of anything other than a cold.  She had a fever of just over 101, but it went down with Tylenol and short nap.  Again another bad night of sleep.

Sunday morning she still had the cold, but didn’t feel hot (so we didn’t take her temperature, assuming no fever).  We debated taking her to the doctor but ultimately didn’t, figuring it’s nothing but a bad cold that will run its course.  Nothing the doctor can do anyway.

Sunday afternoon, she wakes up from her nap with gobs of pus coming from her eyes.  Now, we’re worried it’s Pinkeye (thanks, Ari!), so we call the doctor’s office, and get the service, which is some very young sounding guy in a nearby hospital who gets the pages for this practice when the office is closed.  I describe the symptoms, he asks some questions and determines that it’s not serious, and unless her eyes get really swollen, she could wait until the next day to see the doctor.  We wash her gently with warm water, and no more pus forms.  Another bad night of sleep.

She wakes up this morning with no pus, though she is still clearly not comfortable and tired.  We again decide against the doctor, since the eye issue resolved and didn’t worsen.  Fine.

This morning, she wakes up from her morning nap again with pus, so this time my wife decides to take her to the doctor.  Now, before you judge me based on the next paragraph, I ask you to please understand that other than being tired and generally uncomfortable, she wasn’t making any indication of pain, she wasn’t grabbing at her ears, and she was, for the most part, in a good mood.  She was blabbing and playing and interacting with us all day during Productive Day.

Anyway, it turns out she has a double ear infection, and left the doctors office with a prescription for antibiotics (and eye cream).  Aside from the reaction I had, which was “wonderful, another one of my kids inherits my predisposition to ear infections,” my wife was upset that she didn’t go earlier to the doctor, and might have been able to get a second dose of antibiotics today.  By the time she got the medicine, it was too late to give two, and the baby could only get one.  I told her there was nothing we could do differently.  The both of us felt so bad for her, because she must have been in some serious discomfort, and there was nothing she could do to tell us.  If only she’d made a motion towards her ear (my wife is very discerning about those, having learned from the first girl), my daughter would have had her in the doctors office for an ear check first thing in the morning (if not Sunday)!

At least now we know what’s bothering her, and we can hope she will start to feel better soon (and get a good night’s sleep)!


Who thought it would be a good idea to pour nail-polish remover on fried potatoes?


These things are NASTY!

And they’re dairy! What’s the point of Potato Chips if they aren’t going to be Parve? (Sour Cream and Onion aside, of course).

BloRena Goes in a New Direction

“Why did you call me a horse f*er?”

“Because you f* horses!”

Ah, yes, the majesty of language that is the F-bomb (and paraphrasing Terence and Philip).

Still, I got this in an email from Adam.

Draw your own conclusions.


You know how there are some words that aren’t inherently dirty, but when you say them, you feel like they are?

Some of my favorites include moist and tickler. But today’s favorite is definitely: glisten.

Add your favorites in the comments!