Category Archives: Rants

I Understand The Way She Feels

It’s being called the “greatest voicemail ever,” (you can listen here), and it is marvelous in all the glory the English language has to offer in the “profanity” category.

I can sympathize, because this reminds me of a story that happened to me in college:

During registration for the second semester of my Senior year, I had to register for a lab that I didn’t want to or need to take, but that was a requirement I was lobbying to get waived (it was second semester Chem lab, to ‘complete’ my bio major, even though I had gotten credit for two semesters of chem lecture and one semester of chem lab from AP Chem; essentially, they were forcing me take a random lab without being enrolled for the attendant lecture).  The waiver was coming, but wasn’t finished, so to be safe, I registered for the lab.

I note at this point that my initial registration was completed without a hitch, my tuition and everything else being totally in order.

The next day I got the waiver, so I head back to the registration room (still doing in person registration instead of online) to drop the lab.  Problem, says the registrar: she can’t get into my registration because there’s a financial hold on my account so my registration is blocked.  What? “I don’t understand, I’m paid up; I just registered yesterday, all I want to do is drop the class.”  “Sorry, there’s nothing I can do, see the bursar.”

I head to the bursar to see what’s up: a $120 lab fee was generated on my account as soon as I registered for the lab.  OK, that’s annoying, but why the hold?  Apparently, the fee, being for that semester is generated retroactively to the date of the bill of the rest of the semester’s tuition, which today being unpaid, is now late and therefore a registration hold.

OK, that’s very odd, I tell the Bursar, but nonetheless, I am actually not taking that class, I just need to drop.  “I can’t take off the hold, it’s on the account,” says the bursar.  What?  Look, I am not paying a lab fee for a lab I am about to drop.  The fee will disappear in 30 seconds if you just let me drop it, I plead.  Finally, I get the Bursar, not to remove the hold, but to lift it for one day.  “Tomorrow, it’s going back on!” she threatens me.  “Do your worst” I think to myself as I mutter thanks, “I am dropping the damn class.”  I head back to the registrar, and drop the lab.

Given all this, I should really not have been surprised when my initial application for graduation was denied because I hadn’t completed all of the requirements of my major.  “What am I missing?!” I ask incredulously. “Second semester Chem Lab” says the registrar apparently unable to read the  waiver letter in my file (that I can see there in the file, plain as day) that says I was exempted.  I point out the letter, he says “Oh, ok you’re good.”  “So can I graduate?” “You need to fill out a new application; once it’s rejected, we can’t do anything about it.”


“Too Hot” To Work Here

If you’ve seen today’s Daily News, you’ve likely seen the cover story about the lawsuit filed by a woman against a company owned by Orthodox Jews, where she claims she was fired for being “Too Hot.”  Or maybe you saw it on Above The Law.

I have three reactions to this:

1. There should be no such thing as “too hot.”  Who fires an attractive women just for being attractive.  If that’s what happened, these people are dumb.  (Note, I don’t think that’s what happened.)  We should be encouraging hotness in the workplace. [I’ll finish the rest of this post just as soon as I get back from mandatory sexual harassment training.]

2. If she really was fired for, let’s say, dressing inappropriately (even if to the more exacting and nitpicky standards of Orthodox Judaism), then it behooves her employers (not as a legal obligation, but a religious one) to let her go in a way that allows her to maintain some dignity and does not cause her to publically file a lawsuit that, let’s face it, is salacious and juicy and people will use to mock/ridicule Orthodox Jews/Judaism and therefore causes a chillul hashem.  However, as it seems to me in this case, that was unavoidable.  This woman seems like a fame-whore.  The kind who joins a website that helps people get on reality TV.  The kind that hires Gloria Allred.  It’s possible that the lawsuit and the stupidity was unavoidable.  Which brings me to my legal argument.

3. This is Bullshit (that’s a legal term of art).  A private employer can set whatever standards or dress codes it wants for its offices.  That’s not religious or sexual discrimination.

The woman, Lauren Odes, is quoted saying, “I am Jewish as well and don’t feel any employer has the right to impose their religious beliefs on me.”  Well, you know what?  They do.  They are a private employer, and if you want to work there, you have to live by their dress code.  B&H is closed Shabbos.  Is that “imposing religious beliefs” on all the employees that might want to work on Saturday?  Of course not, and even suggesting it makes me feel dumber.

The article suggests that she wore to work the same dress she wore to the press conference, and is in the pictures of her on the Daily News website.  To my eyes, it’s borderline but not problematic.  But my eyes don’t matter.  The skirt doesn’t cover he knees, the sleeves to cover her elbows, and the high belt certainly accentuates her bust.  I might not agree with these criteria, but I certainly support an employer’s right to impose them.

A lot is made of the fact that this was a Lingerie factory/distributor.  That’s entirely irrelevant.  It’s an office.  You work in an office, you dress appropriately for that office.  I am sure nobody is walking around the main corporate offices of Victoria’s Secret in lingerie.  It’s an office, a place of business.  She’s not a model at a photo shoot.

Finally, and kind of circling around to my first point, this woman clearly has an inflated opinion of herself, and I have very little doubt that she (i) fabricated or embellished her story and (ii) gets a HUGE rush out of saying, over and over, the words “too hot.”  Please, honey, you ain’t too hot for squat.

Lowering the Age of Marriage Will Reduce Rapes

I really, really, REALLY hope this guy is a crackpot.  I mean, I KNOW he’s a crackpot, but what I’m hoping is that everyone realizes he’s a fringe lunatic and nobody actually listens to him.  Because if this dude’s organization is a legit lobby, and has the ability to influence Israeli legislative policy, then we’re all fucked.  Because this might be the worst change in the law since Obamacare (Zing!).

Seriously, though, among some of the insaner things this guy is saying, is that letting THE GIRLS get married a year earlier (just so the guys can have sex, apparently) will reduce the amount of Rape in the country.  That’s right, Chareidi Israeli boys are must be wound-up, pent-up balls of sexual frustration, because it seems “they rapin’ errybody out here.”  I know what you’re thinking (because you didn’t click the link and read the article): “really?  no, he didn’t say that.”  But he did:

[Crazy wacko] said that lawyers are currently examining the legislative aspect of the bill, “We will curtail rape cases and violation of the law by allowing marriage a year earlier.

 “This one year is significant. Nowadays boys and girls cannot have relations, and we will allow this by letting them marry, while encouraging and guiding them,” he said.


Then, of course, there’s the misogyny that’s already been pointed out, like this gem (paraphrased: “women stay home”):

The purpose of changing the marriage age, according to a haredi source, is “to change the haredi view that has been prevailing in recent years, according to which girls must acquire an occupation before getting married. This approach is mainly held by interested persons such as directors of seminaries and different school who want as many girls to join their institution.

 “The haredi press is also guilty,” the source added, “Because it promotes an agenda that says women must be educated. This is very unfortunate and is promoted not by rabbis, but by businessmen that control the education apparatus.” (Emphasis added)

But wait, it gets better.  Then this guy goes all Larry Summers (except without the science to back him up, or the positive intentions):

“The woman is not the reason, she is the emotions. A woman isn’t reasonable; she is emotional and the man possesses the reason.”

I guess that is something I can sort of agree with: Bitches be crazy!

Been a while since I could break out the “Rants” tag and the “Stupidity” tag, but I think this definitely fits the bill.

HT @DovBear via Twitter

Lost Convenience

I just got my firm’s benefits enrollment package for next year, and there was one change that really stuck out to me as ridiculous:

Starting January 1, 2011, in order to use FSA dollars to purchase over the counter medicine, you will need a prescription.

Think of the look your doctor will give you the first time you ask for a prescription for Tylenol.

This is completely ridiculous.  (Just to be clear, I am not blaming my firm, this is not their decision.  It’s either statutory or imposed by the benefits adminsitrating company).

How is this going to be administered?  Will the teenage idiot behind the counter have to ask everyone that buys Tylenol if they have a ‘scrip in order to use FSA dollars?  Will the purchaser have to send a copy of the scrip into the company to verify each purchase?  Does the perscription have to specify an amount?  Can I keep reusing the same perscription?

Who came up with this utter stupidity, and what functional purpose could it possibly serve?!

Losing an Hour/Gaining an Hour

When I was younger, switching from DST to ST meant “gaining an hour of sleep.”  The theory behind this is, go to sleep at a set time, wake up a set time, on the night you switch, there’s an extra hour between those set times.

Now that I’m older and have kids, the very real flaw in that “logic” comes through: who the hell sleeps until a set time, especially on a Sunday?  Not my kids, that’s for sure.

So on a regular day, my kids wake up sometime between 6:30 and 7am.  Roll the clock back, and that won’t change.  Except now it’ll be between 5:30 and 6:00.  Ugh, I DO NOT WANT to wake up at 5:30 on any day.

Not to mention my body being extremely used to, uh, evacuating certain waste materials, at a specific time, then that’s just going to make my Sunday very, very loooooooooong.

Factor in now, that my kids will start getting tired and cranky and ready for bed an hour (on the clock) ahead of schedule, then keeping them up until “bedtime” will be annoying as well.

This is like imposed jet lag.

Can we just do away with changing the clocks at all anymore?  I’m not a farmer, I don’t need to shift an hour of daylight from the morning to afternoon and vice versa anymore.  Just pick one time and stick there.

Changing the clock sucks.


Every once in a while, I get an annoying email from a car dealer near me, purporting to be a statement of my rewards dollars or whatever.  I have no account with them, my balance is always 0, I have never bought a car from them, and I have no idea how they got my email address.

What really bugs me is that I scrolled to the bottom of the page to unsubscribe, and I had to register for an account in order to set my email preferences to get no emails!  What the F*ck?!?! That is NOT COOL.

That kind of bullshit should be illegal.  I have half a mind to call this stupid dealership and threaten to report them to some consumer protection something if they don’t take me off their email and snail mail lists (yeah, I get snail mail from them also).

God, they are SO ANNOYING!

Oh, I Hate Brett Favre

Obviously, I’m not reporting news about Favre coming back, again, un-re-un-re-re-retiring, but goddamn do I hate him something fierce.

Take, for instance, this quote in today’s NY Post:

“This is not about revenge, or anything like that, believe me,” Favre said. “I think it’s great for football. I can’t see how you wouldn’t think it would be.”

Holy F-ing Damn!!  He’s not doing this for himself, he’s coming back to play for the Vikings for the good of the game.  He really thinks he’s God’s gift to football, that sitting out would be bad for the game and he has a responsibility to play (just not to go to training camp or put any work in).  It’s not about him, no, it’s great for FOOTBALL.  As if football desperately needs him.  He can’t even see how this entire shitshow wouldn’t be good for football!!

What a f-ing narcisistic piece of shit douchebag.  Ugh, I HATE HIM.

Right now, I can only hope that some defensive lineman is planning on rolling through his knee.  Please, GOD, let that happen.